Root language

Today I reviewed my lab midterm and discovered that basic stupidity — not math — is to blame for my less than acceptable grade on the test. I have an English degree, so in theory I should be able to read and comprehend test questions, right? Alas, I’ve fallen short in both categories. I am woe.

That said, I did see two items in my instructor’s lab today that both inexplicably improved my mood and piqued my interest: a hairdryer and a hand-held blender. Why? Why?!? What do they do with these things when no one’s looking? Are the biology graduate students at UTA moonlighting as beauticians and chefs? If so, can they make some sense of my crazy mop of hair and teach me how to cook with tofu? I’d happily pay them or edit their papers in return.

An aside: What is it about men and accents? Why does a man with an accent distinguishable from mine make me weak in the knees? Southerners, Brits, Germans, Italians, those from north of Utah and west of the Dakotas, midwesterners, Canadians, Yankees — they get my blood pumping. The accent alone doesn’t seal my attraction, but if he’s smart and kind and cute AND he talks funny? I’m at his mercy. Gals (and guys), have you experienced anything like this?

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4 Comments

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4 responses to “Root language

  1. OK, I’ll bite. I sort of have a thing for European women, especially Eastern European women. Last year, I had a huge, painful crush on a six-foot Czech with a husky voice. I’m still not totally over that, but then there’s a cute little Bulgarian MFA student in my department whose accent makes her a lot cuter. Like sophisticated European types would be into some Desperate Housewives addict from Oklahoma…

  2. Pirates with sinus colds… now that’s sexy.

  3. Why wouldn’t a sophisticated European type be interested in an Oklahoman? I wonder whether anyone finds OUR accents sexy? (You’ve always sounded more Californian to me than Oklahoman, but it’s hard for me to judge these things, as I am, in fact, an Oklahoman.)And what about the Texas accent, hmmm? I managed to avoid picking up a heavy Okie accent all those years, but the Texas twang took root with swift authority, and now I’m afraid my long I’s are so long they need their own postal codes.

  4. I’m trying to imagine what a pirate with a sinus cold sounds like, but after trying several times to simulate it in the privacy of my own home, I’ve mustered only a guttural “ngaaar,” which sounds more like an angry, muzzled dog than a pirate.Erin, would you be so kind as to give us the phonetic pronunciation?

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